


The Reward of Being Not Dull

by Shi_3



Series: After Apocalypse: When We're All Together and Having Fun [2]
Category: X-Men - All Media Types, X-Men Evolution
Genre: Gambit Just Wants A Smol Friend For His Tol Self, Gen, Light-Hearted, Scott Just Can't Have A Nice Training Session, X-Jet Shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-10
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:15:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26385490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shi_3/pseuds/Shi_3
Summary: A very suspecting Scott lets Gambit onto the X-Jet, and almost everyone regrets it.
Series: After Apocalypse: When We're All Together and Having Fun [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1637989
Kudos: 29





	The Reward of Being Not Dull

**Author's Note:**

> “Security and safety were the reward of dullness.”  
> ― Hanif Kureishi
> 
> Never let it be said that the x-men are dull.

“Any questions?” Scott asked, sternly looking at the group, all paired up and debriefed on flying and parachute safety.

Silence.

Because if anyone actually had a question they’d probably get hit with several explosive items from several different people if they had opened their mouth and encouraged Scott to keep droning on. 

“All right. Now, _before we take off,_ are everyone’s belongings secured?”

Gambit thought it was kind of rude that Scott glared right at him as he said it. Sure there’d been a couple incidents with some loose card decks before and the potatoes that one time, but there was no need to look like it had been anything other than a mildly entertaining aspect to otherwise boring training exercises. No one died. 

The glare was also making Laura glance up at him like she didn’t trust him, and while that was probably smart of her, it made him feel a little bit like he might have to ‘accidentally’ push Scott out of the plane at least once. It was hard enough to build up rapport with the x-men members without the wonder-boy's interference. If their newest member was going to distrust him, it would be because she was looking him directly in the eye while he did something of a questionable but undeniably debonair nature.

There was a chorus of agreements to Scott’s question. 

“ _All_ of your things?”

He joined in on the chorus of agreements, pointedly _not_ checking the pockets of his trench coat, which Scott was scowling at like they had personally wronged him. 

“Bobby is flying again and I don’t want any _cherished items_ slicing anyone up this time.”

Ok, honestly, those had been literal paper-cuts and Scott could be the star of a Telenovela with his ability for dramatic flair. At least the idiocy had turned Laura’s wary displeasure onto Scott, and she was glaring at him like he was being stupid. Which he was.

Gambit began looking around for these alleged insecure items like they were going to pop out of thin air. He even tried moving Laura’s hair away from her face so he could check behind her ear. She swiped a hand at him, thankfully unclawed, and bared her teeth in warning. 

“Please _ensure_ they are secure.” Scott kept staring daggers while Gambit's eyes widened with shock and he clutched at his nonexistent pearls as he mimed finding something he hadn't noticed before on his lap. He looked around with feigned panic and then wedged the ‘item’ underneath his seat.

“Are we all sure that we’re all secure?”

Gambit gave his 'discovered' item a good kick underneath the seat, just to make sure it was _secure,_ and made a show of wiping off sweat and fanning himself in relief. 

Never let it be said that he wasn’t a contributing member of the team. 

“Even the _small ones_?” Scott demanded, still very much _staring_ at Gambit. Gambit gave up on trying to telepathically tell him to shut up and get the show on the road because Gambit wasn’t an idiot, thank you. He considered verbally saying it, but letting Scott stew in his own juices was probably the better option. He just stared at Laura, hoping she would look up at him so they could start a plan on how to throw Scott off the plane without a parachute in the name of natural selection. “They are _secure_?”

Another chorus of more insistent and belligerent agreements as the others got bored with this line of questioning. Laura joined in with a growled ‘yes’ that had enough withering rancor that Wolverine would probably cry with pride if he had heard it.

“Ok, Gambit, would you just check so we can go?” Scott asked, sounding exhausted. 

Everyone looked at Gambit, even Laura, who he was still staring down at. 

“What?” she demanded.

And because he was a contributing member of the team that could be entrusted with its security and who only wanted to lighten the burden of their training leader, he smiled in a way others had described as ‘very charming’ and asked with a degree of concern and affection he would call _dazzling_ , “Do you feel safe, petit chéri?”

Adamantium claws popped out in an expression of absolute, livid rage. Even the toe claws, which in a long line of causing small, clawed, angry beings to pop out their claws because of utter hate and a desire to cut him, that was new.

“I will stab you,” she threatened, or perhaps vowed. Wouldn’t her Perre be proud?

“I was just checking!” Gambit protested loudly. “Scott-”

“Ok, fine! Let’s go!” Scott said, throwing up his hands. He did it in defeat while everyone else did it in celebration. They even gave cheers.

They were less happy when Gambit’s four loose packs of playing cards flew out of his pockets on the first barrel roll and started flying around like they had personal vendettas against every member on board. Which was really very unfortunate. Who could have predicted such a thing? 

“GAMBIT!” Scott roared with great displease while shrill screams rent the air.

Two of his wrapped packs also flew out, but comparatively that seemed less concerning.

“You are so dead,” Laura said, slicing apart the cards flying toward her face. It probably should have sounded like a warning or a threat, but it really didn’t. As sliced cards flew past her face, to go cause chaos behind them, her eyes glittered with amusement. And really how could Gambit regret having so many cards fly around in an unsecured and devastating manner when it got such a hard eyed girl to almost smile?

He did maybe have one regret when one of those wrapped packs of cards hit him squarely in the eye though.

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this [tiktok](https://www.tiktok.com/@bitty_01/video/6811865971351981318?source=h5_m&lang=en)!
> 
> Someday I will do a humorous x-men one-shot that doesn’t star Gambit, but it is not _this_ day.  
> Let me know if you have any humorous prompts/ ideas you would like to see. I can't promise anything but I'll probably try it out!


End file.
